Thankful for what I lost

I feel like I should preface this post by saying, I'm not thankful for everything that I've lost, read further to fully understand what I mean by "what I lost".

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November is the notorious month of being thankful, and in my effort to document my little family's life, I, too, wanted to make note of the things I am thankful for as of late...

My new perfume is the scent of baby barf that seems to accumulate all over-it's like an epidemic some days!

My new 'do is a messy bun on top of my head...

My new style is a pair of leggings, and a comfy t-shirt that I can easily whip out a boob at a moment's notice (to feed the baby, that is)....

My heels have been replaced with a pair of low, comfy shoes-boots as of late...

Victoria Secret has been replaced with Motherhood wear- nuff said! ;)

What was once sleep-filled nights is now 2, 4, and 6am feedings.

And let's not forget losing my pride! Having a baby has a way of taking your pride, throwing it on the ground, and stomping on it. Oh, and then laughing. Yes, it's that cruel!

Nights snuggled up to the mister watching a movie are now spent with baby laying between us, blowing up his diaper followed by glances of "nooo, it's YOUR turn to change him!" and then analyzing the color of his poo to make sure he's still complying with the newborn poo guidelines. (Don't act like you never did that!) Romantic, huh?

And what was once 8 hour work days, filled with gratifying work I was paid for are now 24 hour UNPAID days of feeding, changing, calming, rocking and playing/teaching the tiny, drooling human.

In fact, there's not much that is the same since this tiny human being has entered my life.

BUT, I'm ok with all of this because for everything that I 'lost', I have gained a new life with the sweetest baby boy. So, my month of November has been filled with thankful thoughts of all the things I  lost, happily.

I do often wonder if my new identity is permanent or just a new mommy trying to figure it all out. Either way, when a puckered lip is made all better by momma's hugs, or when I see Matt in his daddy role- changing a diaper or rocking the baby (and I think, "he's never looked sexier"), or when I'm cluster feeding and I'm sure this is the time my nipples will fall off, or when the babe lights up and gets that BIG gummy grin on his face when he hears my voice or sees my face (nothing melts my heart more)- it's then that I know that I'm right where I need to be, and it's all the reassurance I need. So, I'm thankful for my new role, my new identity-as Henry's mom, even if that means I've lost my former identity, just a little.

Afterall, what I've gained far outweighs what I 'lost'.

Happy Thanksgiving, ya'll! 

Heisel Rules!